Who Wants to Talk About Death over the Holiday Turkey? Instead, Show that You Took Care of Your Advance Care Planning

We’re coming up on that time of year when the holidays bring full tables of family members for that memorable holiday meal. It is also that time when medical experts and medical systems make the recommendations to “have the talk,” about your end of life planning and decisions. 

These experts say it’s a good time to ask your mom or dad or your grandparents how they want to be treated if at the end of life. They may even make recommendations as far as tools to utilize to start the conversation. 

However, personally speaking, I don’t want to have an end of life talk around a holiday meal when I only get to see family for a short time. Instead of having a talk about end of life scenarios, make it about the steps you have made in your Advance Care Planning (ACP) and patient safety. 

Now, that’s a talk I am happy to have and even encourage. I can assure you that death does not monopolize my family meals during the holidays, safety does. Having an ACP conversation is  to make sure that your family knows what you want and when you want it.  

The conversations should center around when it’s time to be aggressive to save your life rather than end it. There must be a clear understanding. For most people, that understanding means that in the majority of instances, you’ll want the medical team to do whatever they can to save your life. However, it is also important to talk about the times when medical care is no longer working and at that point, to die naturally with dignity and respect makes the best choice.

Show Your Love This Season With an Advance Care Plan That Speaks for You

Instead of debating end-of-life choices over your favorite holiday dessert, show the people you love that you’ve already handled your advance care planning with MIDEO.  

MIDEO makes this easy. In minutes, you can record a short video so doctors see and hear your wishes, generate the compliant advance directive form, and name a health care proxy to be your chosen decision-maker. That is good use of your time and will not monopolize your holiday event. 

During the holidays many people buy First Alert for their parents or grandparents. While that can help in terms of getting them medical attention quickly, we encourage you this holiday season to make MIDEO the loving gift you can share. Make it like a gift exchange: you share it with your loved ones and then your loved ones share their MIDEO with you. The bonus is that most times your insurance, especially Medicare, covers much of the MIDEO process. 

We break down the details below.

What a video living will actually is

It sounds like some sort of overly serious and laborious process. But that is anything further from the truth. Here’s the short of it: a video living will, like MIDEO, is your medical preferences recorded in your own words and paired with a signed advance directive form. 

The video portion is important because it takes away the ambiguity involved with traditional advance directive forms which are really nothing more than someone guessing what you want. With MIDEO, the video and any approved medical documents are both instantly shareable and immediately retrievable via secure QR code so clinicians can act fast when it matters most.

Why this season is the right time

Most experts  say to “have the talk” during the holidays. Realistically, that can get awkward. Let’s face it, no family wants to talk about end-of-life issues while chowing down on the Thanksgiving turkey or Christmas Day prime rib. I know I sure don’t!

A better way for many families is action first. Show them that you’ve actually done something. Consider this:

• You finish the steps of advance care planning ahead of the gathering with a MIDEO self-directed or physician guided session.

   

• You show your family your QR and wallet card, so they know you’re covered. You can even share it with them via a text or email through your iPhone.

   

• Tell everyone where or how you got your MIDEO. Explain to them how you felt after completing the MIDEO process.  

Many of our MIDEO patients got their MIDEO because they did not want their family to fret over a decision that could be guilt ridden or difficult. Instead they want to be sure that the family is not disrupted by a medical emergency where no decision or a controversial decision for treatment was put in place. By taking the step with MIDEO now, it sets you up for many more future holidays to come.

MIDEO can transform a holiday meal and that “big talk” into one that shows you’ve taken control of your medical safety and end of life plans. MIDEO truly is a tangible and loving gift for everyone. 

Two ways to get it done with MIDEO

An advance directive with MIDEO is made to be easy. We know that people are busy, so both options can be completed in less than an hour.

Do it yourself in less than 30 minutes

If you’re ready to get started right now, the MIDEO self-directed option guides you through the process. After completing the self-directed Advance Care Planning Education Module, you’ll finish with a video living will, a signed advance directive form, and a secure QR that opens everything in seconds.

Consult one-on-one with a MIDEO Physician

Help from a MIDEO physician makes the process both easy and informative. You’ll meet via telehealth or in person with a board-certified doctor who reviews your history, explains options, and creates your prescription for Advance Care Planning so it’s medically precise and personally authentic. You’ll leave with the same video, form, and health proxy, plus the confidence of professional guidance. 

End of life planning vs. Advance Care Planning (ACP)

There are so many legal terms out there, and many of them sound similar. That’s why I wanted to take a moment to discuss the differences between end of life planning and Advance Care Planning.  

Many professionals will use these terms interchangeably and they are related.  End of life planning is a final component of advance care planning, but to treat this as just end of life planning actually places you at a risk. ACP is about preparing for treatment when you are critically ill and desiring to have medical teams save your life. It’s also about being able to communicate your end of life wishes for when you are terminal and wanting to allow for a natural dying process. 

That is a big difference and a good advance care plan will enable you to safely navigate the process.  

End of life happens once and should be planned for. However, the greater focus should be planning to save your life as that will be what most of you and your family want. Your MIDEO does just that by putting in place the correct legal documents and appointing healthcare power of attorneys (HCPOA), along with your video wishes that emergency care teams can retrieve in seconds during a medical emergency..

Advance directive forms and health care proxy can be confusing

The more knowledge you’re equipped with, the more ready you are to take control of the decisions that matter most. Below we address some of the confusion between advance directive forms and health care proxies. 

What is an advance directive form and what does it do?

It is the signed “legal” (not medical document) that attempts to document your medical treatment preferences when you have lost mental capacity and can no longer make decisions for yourself or have entered an end stage medical condition or state of permanent unconsciousness. These preferences can include your choices for CPR, mechanical ventilation, dialysis, plus other treatment preferences. 

What is a health care proxy?

This is the person you legally authorize to decide for you if you can’t. Many people pick a spouse, adult child, or trusted friend. Your proxy uses your written and video instructions to advocate for what you want during medical emergencies.

How to share this with your family without derailing the evening

Just show them what you did:

• Show your MIDEO ID Card or open the secure QR on your phone.

   

• Say something like this: “I took care of my advance care plan this week so you never have to guess what I want during a medical emergency. If anything happens, my wishes are right here. My goal is to make sure you as a family continue to meet during the holidays.”

   

• Offer to talk privately later if anyone wants details, especially the person you’ve named as health care proxy.

In seconds, your family sees the outcome of your MIDEO. Show them and get back to your holidays.

Why video changes everything

Paper documents are extremely hard to find during an emergency and easy to misread in a crisis. A MIDEO captures your voice, your values, and how you weigh trade-offs. When paired with a signed advance directive form, your care team gets both legal and human clarity. And it is MIDEO that is bringing this modern combination to advance care planning.

MIDEO is a plan that travels with you

Holidays often mean travel. In fact, last year, over 80 million people hit the road or the air over the Thanksgiving holiday and that number is expected to remain the same in 2025.  

Your QR code doesn’t change when you update your plan, and your latest directive is what clinicians see—anywhere in the world. Share access with the people who need it, and revoke it any time. These days, everything is stored on your phone for digital easy access. So why not your advance directive? MIDEO is not just in your wallet or purse.  It’s in your Apple Wallet, in your phone, and even on your Apple CarPlay.  

MIDEO makes the holiday discussion easy

Advance Care Planning does not need to be about death. It’s an end of life planning component, but it should not monopolize the conversation. Talking about ACP is creating patient safety.  

Talking about death is hard and scary. But showing your family you’re prepared is simple. It’s one of the kindest and most loving gifts you could ever give. Handle your Advance Care Planning now so you can get back to what holidays are really meant for…..Family!